Seductive Surroundings

Does the SPCA Cover Stuffed Animals?

2010-01-13T21:35:00.000-08:00

A few weeks ago we had a picture of a gal and her strap-on wearing giant teddy bear. I thought that was pretty unusual. But then I found this pic of a girl with her strap-on wearing tiger. That's just so wrong on so many levels.

Prohibited Activities While Wearing a Cast

2010-01-13T19:13:00.002-08:00

I'm not one of those people that expects everyone to have a perfect body. But I do expect you to refrain from posing for boudoir photos while wearing casts. Wait till you've healed up for crying out loud.

Rust Never Sleeps

2010-01-12T21:32:00.000-08:00

I'll tip my hat to anyone that's willing to strip down and pose nude outdoors. I just wish folks would find somewhere a little more aesthetically pleasing than an old rusty oil tank.

It's Good to be the King??

2010-01-11T21:07:00.000-08:00

Those King commercials always weirded me out. It's not that they weren't amusing or clever, but there's something creepy about that mask. And I'm afraid that a half naked woman wearing it, doesn't make the mask any less weird. In fact, I think it's worse.

In Honor of Deer Season Winding Down

2010-01-10T21:51:00.000-08:00

Where I'm from, a gal like this is worth her weight in gold.

Don't Get Between Her and a Case of MRE's

2010-01-09T21:45:00.000-08:00

I don't think this stocky gal is actively in the armed forces. But she looks ever so comely with her legs spread on a wooden ammo case with her AR-15. Really sets the mood doesn't it?

No Glove, No Love

2010-01-08T21:23:00.000-08:00

Back in the eighties and nineties "No Glove, No Love' was a catchy phrase to try and make people use protection. Apparently, this gentleman took it literally. I can't explain the picture. There's nothing of context in the original photo to lend any explanation to why he's wearing a cotton glove, but there it is for all the world to see.

I Feel Sorry For the Girl

2010-01-07T20:13:00.000-08:00

It's a shame that she put all that effort into fixing her hair up all fancy, only to get banged on a crappy pull out sofa-bed.

How Do You Get a Girl Naked in a Creepy Basement?

2010-01-06T19:50:00.000-08:00

Personally, I don't understand any woman getting naked in a place that looks like it could have been part of Buffalo Bill's lair in Silence of the Lambs.

This is What Airport Security May Require

2010-01-05T19:35:00.000-08:00

I'll be keeping my eyes open next time I fly to see if I'm missing anyone flashing in the airport terminal. I haven't seen it yet, but you can bet from now on I'll be looking.

Nice to Have Friends That Will Lend a Hand

2010-01-04T20:11:00.000-08:00

Nothing like having your BFF give your landing strip a quick touch up before you head out for a night of debauchery. You stay classy San Diego.

Sexy Goulash

2010-01-03T19:59:00.000-08:00

I don't care how hard you try, I can't find anything sexy about a woman stirring a pot of goulash, stew or chili. Considering she's only wearing a pair of thigh high stockings and some frilly panties, I doubt this was an impromptu shot of real life. If on the other hand this is real life, I bet people love to drop by and see what's for dinner.

I'm Just Glad She Didn't Dye Her Hair to Match

2010-01-02T19:59:00.000-08:00

I know people are crazy about their pets. But this is taking it to a new level.

Can We All Make a New Years Resolution?

2010-01-01T20:10:00.000-08:00

I want everyone to make a resolution to take a little bit classier pictures this coming year. With the advent of instant and eventually digital cameras, our standards for home photos have plummeted.

Check out this housewife from the sixties. That's some classy lingerie, not to mention the perfect hair. I bet this was a major event for the couple that took this pic.

Happy New Year's Eve

2009-12-31T19:00:00.000-08:00

It's hard to find New Year's Eve shots to make fun of. Luckily I found this happy lass and her horn blowing hoo-hoo to ring in the new year for us all.

How Much of the Ozone Layer Did She Destroy?

2009-12-30T19:32:00.000-08:00

The girls of my generation helped destroy 72% of the ozone layer by spraying copious amounts of hairspray in order to create monolithic walls of big bangs. Here is a hold over from the early nineties, proudly displaying her bangs as well as her naughty bits.

Landscaping Fetish Part One

2009-12-29T19:24:00.000-08:00

Finally! Something to titillate both my love of lawn and garden implements and my love for half naked women.

Davy Crockett Would Probably Like It

2009-12-28T18:54:00.000-08:00

I'm not sure the folks at PETA would approve, but I'm sure there are plenty of mountain men out there that would like nothing more than a girl wearing a coonskin cap.

Looks Like Too Much Work to Me

2009-12-27T21:10:00.000-08:00

These swingers get a gold star for the most innovative position, but I can't imagine that is very much fun for either one of them.

Amature Spelunkers?

2009-12-26T21:02:00.000-08:00

I've honestly never seen a headlamp in any porn pics before. But the middle girl in this all girl sandwich is wearing one.

Santa Needs Love Too

2009-12-23T22:00:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, we had a lot of shots of ladies and their Christmas trees. But what about jolly old St. Nick?

Oh Christmas Tree, Oh Christmas Tree

2009-12-22T22:00:00.000-08:00

Different families celebrate the holidays in many different ways. Some folks enjoy caroling, or having the family over for a big meal. Others feel obligated to pose provocatively in front of the family Christmas tree. Here are a few of those:

Try to Keep Your Large Felines Seperate

2009-12-21T21:32:00.000-08:00

It's clear she loves tigers by the tiger pillow she's squatting on while flanked by two giant stuffed animal tigers. But it just seems like she's cheating on her beloved tigers by wearing leopard print lingerie.

Mama Said Knock You Out

2009-12-20T17:50:00.000-08:00

What's up with the training gloves? Was he doing some training in the bedroom and all of the sudden decide it was time to make sweet love?

Publish Post

That's Just Wrong

2009-12-19T18:07:00.000-08:00

Who thinks of putting a strap on harness onto a giant teddy bear? This chick!

Maybe You Should Try Some Colorfast Bleach

2009-12-18T19:47:00.000-08:00

The panties read " Powered by 100% Clean Burning Girl Power". Apparently, it's not that clean burning, judging by the big stain below the words.

Are There OSHA Standards for Strippers?

2009-12-17T21:30:00.000-08:00

I salute her patriotism. But I question her dedication to her craft. Are third degree burns to your va-jay-jay worth winning the Stripper of the Year award?

What is that? Cork?

2009-12-16T20:46:00.000-08:00

I'm unsure what the wall behind this middle aged woman is made of. It kind of looks like cork board. Regardless of what it's made out of, it naturally looks better because of the faux medieval sword display above her head.

Be Sure to Wipe the Top of That Bottle

2009-12-15T21:29:00.000-08:00

I was just noticing a sign at the supermarket the other day warning that you should wipe the top of your wine bottle after you opened it, in order to remove any lead residue from the foil cap over the cork. After finding this pic, I can think of other reasons to why that's probably a good idea.

Show the Tattoo You Must

2009-12-14T21:22:00.000-08:00

Normally, I try to photoshop all of the flesh out of a picture. I'd hate to offend anyone's delicate sensibilities. But when I saw this very detailed tattoo strategically placed crotch high on this mullet wearing obese woman, I knew that I had to bend the rules and share a little slice of reality with the viewing public. The force is strong in this one.

Let's Take a Moment to Talk About Size Appropriate Attire

2009-12-13T20:58:00.000-08:00

I want to go on record saying that I'm a fan of the curvy women of the world. But let's be reasonable.

This girl knows what size of clothes she should buy. She knew damn well that when she put on this itsy bitsy bikini, that there were going to be major sections of fabric that were going to disappear into the rolls of her flesh.

Big Eyed Cats Weird Me Out

2009-12-12T20:54:00.000-08:00

I'm not sure I could focus on the lady. The giant pastel colored cat staring up at me from the pillow case would just knock me off my game. She's trying to bring her A game. She's got the fancy red panties and the slip on nipple chain, but that damn cat kills it.

But to be honest that weird tube of ointment on the bedside table is a worse distraction. I don't even want to imagine what that particular tube of salve is for.

I Don't Get It

2009-12-11T20:48:00.000-08:00

If you start from the ground up, this lady is doing okay on the traditional sexy attire:

1. High Heel Shoes
2. Black Thigh High Stockings
3. No Panties
4. Red Leather Mini-Skirt
5. Tight Black Shirt
6. Bondage Dog Collar

So far, so good, but then she kills the mood with:

7. Hideous Floppy Red Hat

Ladies, let this be a lesson to you, say no to hats if you are trying to look hot.

Is Nothing Sacred?

2009-12-10T20:05:00.000-08:00

I'll never be able to go to the hardware store to buy a new handle for my hoe without wondering if someone's mom has been rubbing all over it.

Reduce, Reuse, Recycle

2009-12-09T19:47:00.000-08:00

I dig chicks that recycle. That's one less bottle that will be heading to the landfill, for a little while at least.

I Wish I Had Thought of That

2009-12-09T08:09:00.000-08:00

These swingers have come up with a innovative use for those old front seats you have left lying around after you pulled them out of your 78 Firebird. Use them for a sex seat.

Nice Bass

2009-12-08T07:37:00.000-08:00

This gal is great! Not only is she fishing without any pants, she's caught herself a nice little bass. Both she and the fish are keepers.

Framed?

2009-12-07T08:38:00.000-08:00

Do you really like the look of a flat screen TV, but don't have the money for a new tv? Just frame your old one. Some black board inside a flourescent green wood frame and voila!

And while you're admiring this couple's creativity, please note that Frosty the Snowman is getting a eyeful.

Calisthentics Never Looked So Fun

2009-12-04T21:29:00.000-08:00

If this type of exercise had been part of the Presidential Fitness Test, I think I might have actually tried to get that lousy patch and certificate.

dd

You're Motoring, What's Your Price for Flight

2009-12-03T21:34:00.000-08:00

Check out this massive tower of home entertainment components. I can't even identify all of the pieces. But I can assure you, that in 1987, nobody could beat this guy when it came to blaring "Sister Christian" at full volume. I bet Night Ranger never sounded so good.

Full Moon

2009-12-03T21:33:00.000-08:00

I admire any young woman that moons random drunks that she happens to pass on the street.

Fabric Softener Fetish???

2009-12-03T21:20:00.000-08:00

What do you think of when somebody mentions hot bondage action? If you're like these folks, hot bondage action appearantly involves doing a load of laundry.

That Doesn't Look Very Clean

2009-12-02T19:54:00.001-08:00

This is what I imagine the conversation sounded like that led to this picture:'

"Hey honey, I'd really like to see you insert something wacky into your hoo-hoo."

"Great, what did you have in mind? A cucumber?"

"Actually I was thinking about this dirty old traffic cone I stole from some workers on the street today."

"Great idea!"

I Don't Think That's Approved for Use on Humans

2009-12-02T19:48:00.000-08:00

There is no question that hooking your wife up to a cow milking machine is pretty kinky. The real question is are these a kinky couple of dairy farmers, or someone so dedicated to S&M that they bought their own milking machine. We may never know.

Mmmmmm Snack Time

2009-12-02T19:41:00.000-08:00

Nothing like a quick snack of onions and Coca-Cola (I count fifteen cans). And for a weird bonus, their is a factory AC-Delco stereo sitting at the back of the countertop. At first, I thought it was a toaster, but then I saw the knobs and display.

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Help Us Out!

2009-12-02T08:24:00.000-08:00

If you see a picture that you think has something odd in it, please send it to us and we will do the photoshop work and post it. Send it to:

seductivesurroundings@yahoo.com

We also appreciate comments. And if you like this blog, tell your friends.

Thanks!

Geological Formations and Jorts Get Me Hot

2009-12-02T08:07:00.000-08:00

Nothing like a little flashing when you've stopped to check out some type of mineral spring deposit. Those comfortable yet classy jean shorts would drive any man (or woman for that matter) crazy.

Tour de Nue

2009-12-01T22:19:00.000-08:00

Okay so my French may be a little off, but you get the point. Here we have a middle aged French woman getting ready to ride her bike wearing nothing but a pair of slippers and a smile.

To be honest, if they sprinkled some nude women into the Tour de France, I might watch.

Sweet Ride

2009-12-01T21:57:00.000-08:00

Checkered flag decal on the roof and hood. Somebody's naked mom spread out in front. That's automotive perfection.

Wish I Had Thought of This Game

2009-12-01T18:21:00.000-08:00

Apparently this is a true game of skill. Look how he missed with the two little rings.

I Didn't Know These Things Still Existed

2009-12-01T08:05:00.000-08:00

Last time I can remember seeing a beaded curtain was in the episode of the Brady Bunch where Greg moves into the attic. Seriously I thought these things had all been taken to the landfill years ago. But this Designing Woman has added a bit of casual elegance to her home by utilizing what appears to be, not one, but two beaded curtains. One is black with a white pattern , the other white with a black pattern.

Dig That Crazy Beat

2009-12-01T08:02:00.000-08:00

Nudists from the Sixties were awesome. In the old pics, they are all young and hip. Check out this happy pair practicing their drumming skills.

Looks Like Gravity Won This Fight

2009-12-01T07:30:00.000-08:00

I guess she was giving her lover a special present, so she decided to affix a few bows to her naughty bits. But as you can tell by the rather odd placement of the upper two bows, she's not quite as perky as she was in her youth. Ideally those bows should be at 10 and 2 instead of 5 and 7.

Disappointed.....

2009-11-30T21:51:00.000-08:00

At first glance, I thought this gal was dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS. But then when I looked closer, I found that she was just a kinky chick in a Halloween mask and crotchless panties.

There's a Reason Bathrooms are the Most Dangerous Room in the House

2009-11-30T18:10:00.000-08:00

This curvy girl should probably stay away from any bathroom acrobatics.

Couldn't They Have Moved it Out of the Shot?

2009-11-30T07:58:00.000-08:00

Nothing says "Sexy" like a dirty plate that's been used for an ashtray.

Dream Weaver

2009-11-30T01:41:00.000-08:00

Guns hanging on the wall.
Stains on the previously mentioned wall.
Commemorative Dan Marino wall plaque.
Giant silver hoop earrings.

All pale in comparison to this crazy two toned weave.

Tasty Beverage

2009-11-28T20:16:00.001-08:00

I bet she never even spilled a drop.

Let Sleeping Dogs Lie

2009-11-28T20:11:00.000-08:00

Is there swinger etiquette for dealing with pets? Judging by the angle of this picture, I'm pretty sure a third person was the photographer. So if you are having a swinger get together, is it okay to let your dog stay in the room where the magic is going to take place?

Second Coming of Red Sonja

2009-11-28T19:42:00.000-08:00

I'll admit that when I was in fifth grade, Red Sonja seemed like a kick ass movie. She was probably a celluloid version of every D&D player's wet dream. But as an adult, a woman with a sword just seems weird.

Maybe Lorena Bobbit ruined the image of a woman with a sharp instrument forever.

Why I Don't Like This Picture

2009-11-28T19:38:00.000-08:00

I like curvy girls.
I like girls in mismatched overly tight underwear.
I like guns too.
But I can't enjoy all three things together.
Guns and Girls are not sexy.

The Furniture Version of the Island of Misfit Toys

2009-11-28T19:34:00.000-08:00

I wish we could see more of this room. As it is, I have no clue what type of room this would qualify as. I count at least three pieces of patio furniture in this cluster of mismatched furniture.

Mini-Van Photo Shoot

2009-11-28T07:47:00.001-08:00

Even a thong and stockings can't really improve the sex appeal of a mini-van.

I Always Feel Like Somebody's Watching Me

2009-11-27T19:44:00.001-08:00

What could be more soothing for a boudoir than a giant pair of eyes glaring down at your bed.

Do-It-Yourselfers?

2009-11-27T19:04:00.000-08:00

I consider myself pretty handy around the house, but I can't imagine why someone would have a blowtorch laying next to the bed. Or am I just naive?

Swing Set Innovation by Swingers

2009-11-27T18:20:00.000-08:00

I've got to tip my hat to these folks for coming up with something I've never thought of. No, it's not the position they are in, it's their nifty utilization of a mini-trampoline hanging from a swing set. I don't know if it's for sexual use, although judging by these two, I'm sure it's been called into service at least once.

My Kind of Party

2009-11-27T17:09:00.001-08:00

Two girls intertwined, a guy wearing nothing but a sock on his junk, and an old school Nintendo Entertainment System with no less than seven cartridges to choose from. Seven games!

It looks nice in the den.....

2009-11-27T10:42:00.000-08:00

How many of you have ever thought about purchasing a sex swing, but worried about how it would fit in with the rest of your home furnishings? These folks installed it in their den/rec room and I have to admit, it doesn't seem a bit out of place.

What ya watching? Part 1

2009-11-27T10:28:00.000-08:00

Seeing a TV on in the background of amateur pics is not uncommon. Usually there is some type of porn playing, which makes sense. But there are a lot of pics out there with normal shows frozen in time.

This one I found special because even though it's not an adult movie, the look on the guy's face is priceless. It's as if he's looking out at the naked woman standing above him.

Does This Stuffed Animal Make Me Look Sexy?

2009-11-27T07:28:00.000-08:00

I often wonder what people are thinking when I see a picture of a person posing with a stuffed animal. It's almost like they are intentionally sabotaging the erotic aspirations of the photographer.

Where to Begin?

2009-11-27T07:24:00.000-08:00

If you can get past the bizarre activities on the exercise bike, I'd like you to take a moment to appreciate this fine collection of reproduction medieval weaponry.

Okay now you can turn your attention back to the exercise bike.

Drug Abuse?

2009-11-27T07:22:00.000-08:00

Technically this would probably be classified as paraphernalia abuse.

Commemorative Plates and Pearls

2009-11-27T07:05:00.000-08:00

Look out kids, Grandma isn't just proud of her collection of commemorative plates on the wall!

Creepy Art

2009-11-25T16:59:00.001-08:00

This mature lady posed in front of one of the creepiest paintings I've seen in a while. It's like John Wayne Gacy decided to paint a picture of a skeleton and the Joker. Sadly, we can only see a portion of the overall painting. As a bonus, if you look closely, there is some kind of weird furry item on the futuristic coffee table.

Does Bathong and Dental Hygiene Mix?

2009-11-25T16:48:00.001-08:00

Nothing out of the ordinary about this middle aged bathing beauty, until I noticed the bottle of mouthwash on the tub ledge behind her. Who uses mouthwash while they are taking a bath??

Who Hasn't Used a Towel for a Curtain?

2009-11-25T16:38:00.000-08:00

This young lady posed in front of both a door with a towel curtain and a Spiderman blanket curtain for another window.